Monday, November 24, 2008

Music Therapy

I thought, up until relatively recently, that I was a weirdo for the following observation. I have found that when I am frustrated or angry, soft or chill music seems to piss me off. Why? I had no clue until recently. I have found that when I am feeling aggressive, matching music chills me out pretty quickly.

A few months ago I mentioned this to a friend/coworker. He said he understood and agreed that the same worked for him. I thought perhaps he and I are freaks together, but I have learned better. 

I have have come to understand that trying to change my emotions is pointless and a little stupid. However, if I accept that I am feeling whatever it is that I am feeling and just identify it and with it, it will pass to be replaced by the next one. Carrie has caught on to this, and there are times when some typically Utah idiot does something completely stupid on the road or something and I get all worked up. When this happens, I will ask Carrie for a particular CD to listen to for 3 songs or so. Then I am all relaxed and ready to continue. Carrie has even picked up that I like to just focus on the song and sing along or think about the music or the guitar part in particular, and she lets me zone for a few minutes, and then I am generally just fine.

This is rather counter to everything my parents tried teaching me my whole life - everything pretty much everyone has told me my whole life. It is funny, because my family is not one to harness and/or embrace emotions, but instead we tend to denigrate emotions we deem unfit or unworthy. It is dumb because, like it or not, everyone has emotions of all kinds. Trying to unnaturally prevent or sabotage them just breeds conflict and confusion and unrest. Thus, a little Soundgarden or Deftones or Chevelle can do a lot people a lot of good. I would love to hear people's thoughts.


Chanda said...

You have emotions? Negative ones? Shhhh, so do I.

Jennifer said...

Uh oh. Don't come over here - we are wading in negative emotions.